Today, I’ve a guest blogger, Miss Atas. The opinions are hers alone and I don’t endorse it.
Hello Everybady! I is Ms Atas. Last time I grew up in 2-room HDB. But now after NUS, I is educated, got a good job, so I disdain low class things lah. See, I so high class, know how to use “disdain.” Dunno why Wise Guy asked me to guess blog.
Decked in my Channel bag, and Louboutin heels–my boyfriend got for me from Xiu Shui Market in Beijing, the biggest authentic branded goods market–I dunno why Wise Guy asked me to come to this ghastly kopitiam. Simply ghastly. Looks like JB Malaysia. (No I never been to JB. I Ms. Atas.) Wise Guy said the atmosphere is very relaxed, he loved it. But the tables are at the back alley and they erected a marquee over a patch of soil and gravel to put more tables (see photos above). Wow, I admire the prostitutes sashaying on the gravel. Got an uncle came up to me and ask me how much?! My Channel bag is real ok! After a while, I got to relac, the atmosphere under the stars, al fresco, you know, quite atas.
Reminds me of my kampung life.
You should see the toilet. Got the old toilet smell you know, smelling of tiles and mildew. Don’t come with a full bladder.
I Ms Atas want the table to be full one, even though we ordered the S size for all dishes. The dishes come in S, M, L. You can see from my sexy S-shape body that I am S!
We ordered two specialties, butter pork ribs ($10) and Fried Garlic Chicken ($15). The ribs were so-so; although lean, it wasn’t crispy or buttery enough. The Garlic Chicken was sedap! Superbly garlic and not-dry.
Hookerlily, Wise Guy’s slut friend who wanna snatch men from my target market, liked the 3-egg spinach ($8). OohOoohOooh, maneater also know how to eat veg. But I thought it was too starchy, and no enough eggs to bring out the proper taste of the dish.
The salted-york prawns ($10) were average but the claypot tofu ($8) was a surprising winner. The tofu was very tasty. Aiya, I cannot describe the dish properly, coz I am a maneater, only tasted a bit of it.
Another surprise winner is the curry fish head ($20). The fish was fresh and tender like my boobs (real ones, not like Hookerlily’s), and although the curry was not the assam curry that we like, but it was spicy and strong. As strong as my Australian expat boyfriend. Very tasty. (Editor’s Note: Ms Atas’s boyfriend was originally from Chennai. He’s Indian but she keeps referring him as “Australian.”)
The servers were very friendly and nice although they looked tired.
Overall, while the food was delish, it was meagre. However, I think I’ll bring my Australian boyfriend here for dinner one day, to show him I’m with him not for his money!! This place is good, cheap and has a kampung feel. Absolutely lovely, darlings.
Swis Ling Restaurant
1 Teo Hong Rd
t: 6323 6110
Closed on two sundays a month
Rating: 3.353/5 stars