$20-$40

Marmalade Pantry at the Stables, Bukit Timah

The now defunct Mimolette had the BEST breakfast food that made me shed tears. In its place now is The Marmalade Pantry at the Stables. So I went with great expectations with Mr. NGFL and Chiobu.

The Saddle Club always gives me a tranquil, relaxed feeling but the decor of the Pantry is quite disappointing, run-of-the-mill design without any effort put in and there were a few power trips. The layout is exactly the same as Mimolette but just using different tables and chairs. Mimolette’s decor of outlining all the furniture so that it looked 2D is so much more fun and cool.

Chiobu: Hello!!! I need to maintain my chio-ness, chio dao… so I ordered something with antioxidants, banana berries hotcakes ($16). And the dish came within five minutes. Hotcakes are not hot at all, not as hot as me. In fact, they are cold and probably pre-cooked. The taste was limp and flat without any variation and if it weren’t for the jam and butter, fat and sugar, the dish would score a 0/5.

Wise Guy: My dish of “Eggs of Any Style” ($20), which came with baked tomato, baked beans, mushrooms, bacon and wholemeal bread, arrived immediately after Chiobu’s food. And like her food, everything except for the beans was cold. I really don’t understand the concept of brunch if it’s cold. It’s the first meal of the day and I expect it to be freshly cooked. Do you know how disgusting it is to eat cold egg yolk? And on top of it, the food was bland. I added so much salt it’s like I was trying to recreate the Dead Sea on my plate.

Mr NGFL: I felt so bad hearing Wise Guy complain–he looked as grumpy as the bear in goldilocks story!!–and suggested we should leave the food and go somewhere else… but we were in the middle of nowhere. Ignoring Wise Guy’s suggestion to order their specialty, carbonara with poached eggs, I ordered seafood linguini ($24) instead because of my toothache. My dish was ok, you know. A very Asian taste with lots of hair-bee-hiam (prawn paste) and the prawns were bouncy and fresh. Not great, but ok. Wise Guy insisted that the pasta was undercooked and hard but I thought it was ok.

Wise Guy also insisted that we should have desserts here because he wanted a complete meal. And we ordered coconut cake ($8), cheesecake ($8) and vanilla ice cream ($3.50), because Wise Guy insisted that a meal should always end with ice cream.

We all agreed that the desserts were the saving grace of the restaurant. You could see the specks on the very awesome vanilla ice cream and it tasted very amazing. The coconut cake is like a Christmas fruit cake but with only one fruit (cranberry) and with a covering of cream similar to carrot cake cream. The sponge was too dry. Wise Guy said, “You should eat the cake with ice cream! It will wet the cake up.” And I replied, laughing at his silly logic, “Why don’t they just make the cake less dry?”

The sea salt caramel cheesecake was da bomb! But after a while, the richness overcame us. We agreed that the waiter should have advised us on the portions. The cakes were SO HUMONGOUS. We thought that the restaurant should half the price of the cakes and half the size.

Chiobu: Wise Guy said that the food is the most important in a restaurant but I suggested that good service can ameliorate the standards of the food. Wise Guy and Mr NGFL, two horny gay men, kept staring at the three Malay waiters. They even christened them: Boy, Boy-Man, and Man, and they were already deciding which to choose. (Wise Guy: If you’re reading this, hot boys, call us!) The Boyish Waiter was nice and came to ask us how our food was and Wise Guy was so nervous he stammered. tsk tsk.

But other than that, the service was ok. They didn’t take initiative–for example, we had to ask them for teaspoons for the ice cream–but when you informed them, they were prompt.

One other thing is the restaurant employed a clown to paint children’s faces and make balloons. I wanted to ask him to paint Wise Guy’s face into a panda! From the clown, you know the target audience of the restaurant, families with young children, parents who just want a nice day out without caring much for the food. So there were many screaming, noisy children running around.

Wise Guy: The other patrons we noticed, besides the kids, were lesbians. SO MANY of them. We counted at least 16. I asked Mr NGFL and Chiobu, “We know that gay men are the mark of a good restaurant because gay men don’t waste calories. If gay men eat at a restaurant, then for sure the restaurant must be good. But are lesbians a marker of a good restaurant too?”

Chiobu flatly answered, No. And Mr. NGFL said, “Please, of course not. Lesbians just stay at home and they don’t go anywhere. Even if they go anywhere, they always go out as a couple one. Very sad, so dependent on each other. That’s not how relationships should be.”

Keywords for the review: Hot waiters, old lesbians, screaming children, cold bland food. The atmosphere wasn’t as nice as Mimolette and we won’t return for a long time. Sigh, I regret the passing of Mimolette. I should have patronized it more often. Make reservations, crowded.

Marmalade Pantry at the Stables
55 Fairways Dr
Singapore 286846
T: 6467 9328/ 6467 7748
enquiry.stables@themarmaladepantry.com.sg
Website

ONLINE DELIVERY
T-F: 3pm-11pm
Sat, S, PH: 10am-11pm
Closed on Mondays

Rating: 2.624/5 hotcakes 

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